Sunday, August 17, 2008

Death of a beautiful thing...

When true love dies the world loses a wonderful thing. I never thought it would end this way. It could be that Allah is not done with us yet and some serious purification is about to take place. I know that many of my demons have left me. I may still think about polygamy, but it is no fantasy and I don't fantasize about sex at all which is strangely liberating. Maybe now I can build a healthy relationship from ground zero one day, NOT anytime soon. Allahu Alim. Life will go on and I suppose at some point I have to stop mourning and just move on. All will work out Insha Allah. Even if I don't like it, it will all work out. I have asked Allah to protect my kids and for myself that is all that I can do. I need to focus on becoming the Muslim that Allah wants me to be and leave this crying alone. I need to be firm in my faith and ask Allah for the best. I have to move on. I have to move on. Insha Allah.

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