Polygyny Analysis -- Self Reflection

This has been one of the best videos I have seen explaining the merits and responsibilities of Polygyny. My reflections are more about responsibility an nation building rather than other lowly experiences. I think that I am going to post some responses to some of the videos that are on youtube about polygyny so that I can crystallize my views and beliefs. I have my views and I know where I am. At this very moment I am not in any position to get married again period. I'm broke and living paycheck to paycheck. I can't really dump my homes to get into a better position but actually I think that I will see if I can do some financial maneuvering to get out of my yoke that I am presently in. I think that I was kind of looking for Sakinah to come around and was hoping that she would at least be honest with me. That however would force her to come to grips with some things that are seriously gone wrong and I just don't think that she is at a point where she can do that. I think that she is holding a lot of stuff in and hoping for some kind of break. I know that my position in all of this was a demanding of the truth, but she just wasn't able to do it. I had even gotten to the stage where I was going to go back and wipe the slate clean, but I feel her ego got in the way, maybe it was both of our egos who knows. Right now though I am going to do what I have to do. I feel that when I get this thing off of my foot I can start to hustle so that I can make some serious money, doing whatever. I plan to start speaking soon and teaching. I do know that when I do go into marriage again though I am just going to say that I am a polygamist and hopefully that can be worked out right up front. I think that I would take back both of my ex wives though. Sakinah and the otherone. Not only because I want my children around me and I have been robbed from being in the lives of my eldest two for too long now, but I think that would be the best and most responsible thing for the family. I will take Sakinah back if she could just tell the truth and accept me as I am. Which she won't so oh well.

So I will start a new family. This thing will be over soon and then the focus is all about the money at that point. Buy real estate, sell real estate, collect rent. Then take the time to do what I want to do with my life. Teach and help my community and build Islam.

You just have to get to a point where you know who you are. I know many of you out there may be mad at me, but I am accepting me for me. Eventually I will meet someone else who will do the same, we will make goals, we will accomplish goals, we will be happy Insha Allah.