Fighting depression Again

The fight took everything out of me. This happens every month around this time of hers. I suppose she starts feeling a little regret with all the hormones and stuff, but she will be back to normal in a couple of days. Good Lord though it took everything out of me. I want to run, just get in my car and go. I can't do it, my heart can't take it. Damn it. Those tears were gone, I had buried them where is my stone. The stone that has become my heart. The barren wasteland of me. Leave me alone and just go and live your life in the heart of luxury and leave me be.

Nothing just nothing. I mourn my loss, my marriage, my love, my children, my family all lost to foolishness.

Where can I go. I need to leave, there must be an escape somewhere. I have my Salaat and the sky is still blue, and the flowers are still in bloom. My children still love me.

Please just leave me alone and go away.