Recovery

Jumuah today was about the Establishment of Salaat. I reflected deeply how off the mark I am. You hold on to the Rope to pick yourself up when you fall. To give you some strength in a sea of despair and misdirection. Here you are in the cold holding on to your Deen with all of your might. The thing about Recovery is this Yesterday doesn't exist. This is the most important thing to recovery. Just as the killer walked towards the village of the righteous if your recovery is sincere then you have a chance. So many times we half-ass it. However that is why we have 5 prayers. Fix it get it right. Will we ever? I don't know but here is another prayer to try again. So here I am trying again to get it right. Get it right before my last breath. I have prayed all of my reversion. Insha Allah one of those prayers will count. Cause my mind I know is all over the place when I pray. So I don't know if I should pray faster or dhikr throughought. I don't know.

My Grandma Passed the other week and wow what a homecoming. They never sing that one song but it was a riveting experience nonetheless. More to come on that. Now though I have to go to bed. I started snapping at the kids and that is from not getting enough sleep. So now I must force myself to go to bed.