Thursday, May 24, 2007

Rules

I firmly believe that there are Rules of Relationships that directly deal with Allah's Will or Karma if you don't like that word. Some of you may even call them superstitions, but these are somethings that I believe in. In terms of relationship dynamics I feel that these rules must be honored.

  1. No sex before marriage. I believe that sex before marriage strips the marriage of any blessing. Starting out on the wrong foot is a steep uphill battle. I'm not saying that it can't work I'm saying that it isn't blessed from the start.
  2. What you don't respect in the person you are with will be missing in the next. I believe that if you are in a relationship and if you complain about that relationship or you cheat and that relationship comes to an end. The good qualities of the person that you were with will be absent in the next person that you get with. If person A was good with money, person B won't be. If person A was a good talker and listener, person B won't be etcetera. Unless the that person violated the relationship bonds. In that case the next person should be better, unless you are breaking some other rules.
  3. No blessing comes out of polygamy if what you currently have isn't cherished first.
  4. Getting involved before your heart heals only damages the heart and taints the relationship. So even if that person "completes" you wait until your heart says that it is time to move on. Without closure a traumatic rip will only bleed into each relationship that you enter. The only good thing that could come out of it is if one hooks up with the medicine man/woman, that person that understands your pain, nourishes your needs and allows you to heal. Unfortunately that person isn't the one 9 times out of 10 and committing to them would break the rules. To make it work you would have to break-up with them finish healing and come back at a later time.
  5. The grass is not greener with out closure. If you are in a bad relationship you can't stage your exit into a better relationship. What I mean is you can't start a relationship before ending and healing from the one you are currently in.
  6. Trust will not naturally foster itself in a relationship that starts with doubt. Your new beloved was a stripper, or promiscuous and you wonder about that in the back of your head. That won't go away just because titles have changed.
  7. Love is earned not given.
I will continue to add to my list so check back on this post from time to time, or maybe I'll just change the date stamp every time I update it. I have more, but they are all escaping me now because I'm thinking too hard.

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